The Start of It All....

    

About 6 months ago...I am about 17 pounds heavier now.

     My name is Kimberly. I'm 44 and I'm fat. I haven't always been this way. Quite the contrary actually. Throughout my childhood and teen years I was athletic, healthy and lean. As a young adult, following high school and college athletics, I became shapely. But still I remained a far cry from obese.
     When I was around 10 years old I asked my mother to take me to the doctor because I feared something was wrong with me. My primary, actually my only symptom...my ribs were showing. Growing up in a family of overweight adults on both my father and mother's sides I was very distraught at my apparent abnormality...a flat stomach with visible ribs. I look back now and wonder how my mother controlled the urge to punch me in the face.
     Around this same time my mother had her first of two weight loss surgeries. Gastric bypass surgery was still controversial and considered experimental at the time, forcing my mom to travel two and a half hours away from our home near Tampa, Florida to Shands Hospital in Gainesville, Florida for the procedure. I remember visiting her in the hospital to see the large rolled gauze "baby" strapped on her wound which extended the length of her torso, sternum to below her belly button.
     Her recovery from the surgery was slow and painful but not nearly as difficult as adjusting to life with her new, drastically smaller stomach. Three bites at a meal was about all she could take. One more meant she vomited everything up to only try to start again. Certain foods were worse than others and much trial and mostly error took place. But, the weight melted off. My mother lost over 100 pounds.
     As the years went by, she put the weight came back on. By the time I was in high school she was heavier than ever. I can honestly say, however, that her weight never appeared to stop her from doing anything she needed to do. What I didn't know, and wouldn't realize until I too had become overweight, was that I am certain her weight kept her from doing many things she wanted to do.
     I will soon tell you the reasons behind my somewhat recent weight gain, but for now let me tell you the catalyst for beginning this journey at this time...like now...as in RIGHT NOW. What I'm about to write is not for the faint hearted but it is real. The absolute truth!
     I was sitting on my couch last night watching television with my husband. We own a leather, reclining couch and I had the leg rest up sitting with my legs extended out in front of me. Being in the comfort of my own home, I let out a little, silent toot. Now, as all of the ladies out there can attest, sometimes if you're sitting just right and fart, it will roll up your front side and escape the top of your hoo ha. It's happened to us all. In this particular instance, not only did my flatulence roll up the front, it took a sudden detour into the crack created by my belly fat laying on the top of my thigh.
     But wait, it gets better! Of course I can feel this happening and I assume that it will simply escape the side of my fat crack and none will be the wiser. Oh, it escaped alright but did not go silently into the night. All of a sudden there comes this high squeaky "poof" sound that causes my husband to look over and say "What was that?"
     Rest assured, this man has heard me fart...many times. But this sound was distinctly different. I was mortified, which rarely happens as I typically have no shame. I started laughing to mask my embarrassment and responded "You don't even want to know." But I eventually told him.
     About thirty minutes later I went to take a shower to freshen up as my hubby and I had discussed getting frisky. I stood in the shower and cried, and cried. I kept thinking about how horrified I was about what had just happened. I did not feel sexy...at all!! And it was right then and there that I made the decision to start this weight loss journey and share my experience. Yes, I was motivated by a fat fart!

Senior year of high school, 17 years old

Going to a wedding, 19 years old